Identifying good and bad paraphrases
time to complete: 20-30 minutes
Let’s look at some examples of paraphrases from law.
Task: For the pairs of text below, identify if they are a good/bad paraphrase and then check why with the explanation that follows.
Example 1
Source text
“The potential benefits of the Internet are numerous and range from the simple improvement of communications, to a revolution in commerce and an increased potential for increasing the democratic involvement of citizens whether in the nation state or in some level of political engagement.”
Adapted from Akdeniz, Walker & Wall, The Internet, Law & Society, 2
Paraphrase
The potential benefits of the Internet are numerous and range from the simple improvement of communications, to a revolution in commerce and an increased potential for increasing the democratic involvement of citizens whether in the nation state or in some level of political engagement.1
1 Akdeniz, Walker & Wall, The Internet, Law & Society, 2000, pg 4
Example 2
Source text
“The Internet is an international medium and although views will differ on how it should be managed in other ways, all countries should be able to agree on legislation for child abuse and pornography. Balancing the need to protect minors with the need to maintain freedom of expression is continuing to prove difficult.”
Paraphrase
The Internet is an international form and opinion might differ on how it should be regulated in some ways, but everyone should be in agreement on child abuse and pornography laws. Assessing the need to safeguard minors with the requirement to preserve freedom of expression is a difficult problem.
Example 3
In this example, there are 2 paraphrases of the same source text. First, read the source text and then decide which paraphrase is better and why.
Source text
As performers of the Western classical repertoire, we are acutely aware of the subtle interplay of our bodies and minds, and of how these elements develop generally through the course of our life histories, but also, and more specifically, how they function during a music rehearsal process. The performance of the rehearsed music has different physical, mental, and social demands, and we react sometimes in a way that heightens and sometimes inhibits the music we have learned. To date, researchers in music psychology have tended to emphasise the cognitive growth of the musician, looking at how knowledge of musical structures emerge. The role of the body in the production of the work has been relatively underplayed. The current paper provides evidence and discussion to explore the ways in which the body can be regarded as being central to the formation of musical knowledge and the expression of it.
Adapted from Davidson and Correia (2001)
Paraphrase A
Davidson and Correia (2001) explain how the cognitive growth of the musician has been the focus of much music psychology research. This has often meant an emphasis on looking at the development of musical structures. In contrast, they argue that the ‘role of the body in the production of the work has been relatively underplayed’ (2001:71). Performers of Western music tend to have knowledge of the inter-relationship between the body and the mind. There is also an awareness amongst performers of how this relationship may change over a lifetime with the effect of performing and all the challenges that presents. These could be mental, physical, or social and the reactions to these challenges can cause both positive and negative reactions in terms of a given performance.
Paraphrase B
Davidson and Correia (2001) state that as musicians and singers from the Western classical tradition, we are strongly aware of the subtle connection between our physical state and thinking, and of how these features change generally through our life, but also, and more exactly, how they work during a rehearsal. The performance of the practiced music has different physical, intellectual, and social demands, and we react sometimes in a way that increases and sometimes inhibits the music we have learned. Until today, researchers in the psychology of music have tended to stress the cognitive growth of the musician, looking at how knowledge of musical structures emerge. The role of the body in the making of the work has been relatively underestimated.
Example 4
In this example, there are 2 paraphrases of the same source text. First, read the source text and then decide which paraphrase is better and why.
Source text
Since legal scholars, as opposed to historians of law, tend to write about their own legal system, they often adopt an internal perspective without arguing for their choice or even indicating conscious awareness of it. This might suggest that their approach embodies nothing more than intellectual naivety. But as Alfred Schutz (1962, pp. 3-66) and others have suggested, an internal perspective allows the observer to actively participate in the social system – or more precisely, in the social practice being studied.It thus provides a separate mode of understanding that cannot be duplicated by external observation. The social scientist who views institutions from outside obtains insights into their causes and effects, but only inadequately understands the meaning that the institution possesses for its members. Because such meanings are components of a comprehensive lifeworld, as complex as that of an observer’s, they cannot be fully understood unless the observer participates on the same terms as the members
(Dworkin, 1986, pp. 13-15; Post, 1992).
Paraphrase A
Rubin (2010) argues that in contrast to historians of law, legal scholars usually write about their own legal structure and they often take an inside view without insisting on their choice or even showing recognition of it. This might suggest that their approach means no more than a lack of theoretical sophistication. However, some researchers suggest that an internal perspective allows the observer to actively take part in the social system – or more precisely, in the social practice being studied. External observation cannot replicate this different comprehension. If a social scientist views institutions from outside, he or she only gains understanding of the institution’s meaning for its members. This is due to the fact that such meanings are parts of a complete world, as complicated as that of an observer’s, and they cannot be fully comprehended without the observer participating in the same way as the members (Rubin, 2010).
Paraphrase B
Rubin (2010) comments that the internal perspective legal scholars take may have some advantages. He notes that although it may appear that this focus on their own area of law is an unconscious oversight, many commentators (including Schutz, 1962 cited in Rubin, 2010) have suggested that legal scholars may have a greater understanding of how law works within their own social context than that of historians of law, who tend to view the legal system from outside. This understanding, Rubin argues, is something not as accessible to external observers. These external perspectives may provide an understanding of reasons and consequences, but may also miss the wider insight into how that system is experienced by its participants. By observing and commenting on the legal system from inside, legal scholars can gain insights into each aspect of this ‘comprehensive lifeworld’ (Rubin 2010:549).